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Zana'Kay

 Why I Blog

                                 

 I write so I can be real to myself. I write where it hurts and the stitches heal. I do not write for anyone. I don’t write  fiction or bedtime stories. I write of the parts of my life story that keep me awake at night when I should be dreaming. I write because my writing casts no shadows. I write to smile. I’m not your everyday girl. Sometimes I wear my skeleton  on the outside.

 

 The electronic space bridges the divide of communication that exists amongst womankind in our current civilization.Women I believe, are creatures of connectivity.We connect families through marriage.We connect with women that we are not in the slightest related to through friendship. We connect  generations through the bearing of children  and through those children we connect ourselves to eternity ...to the future.

 

I write to speak to myself and to send signals to women who are speaking similar words to themselves.The signal that I get back strengthens me.Yes I am strong and independant.But i am not an island.I am like the telephone box.I am nothing without the conversation.

 

I think blogging is a fallback plan.Women in survival mode sending signals to each other.In a normal world or utopia we should be able to have each others b

ks and exchange information  and inspiration physically but the world we have constructed for ourselves has put us so much apart that this is the only way to reach out to anybody who will listen to a strange woman  writing from strange lands.

 

Zana 'Kay

 There is no such thing as the African dream. Only individual dreams of each African bound together by a the way chewing gum could stick back the broken handle of a porcelain teapot. Dreaming is a very personal thing, like masturbation. You cannot dream for someone. Maybe just about them . The only

person who can experience orgasmic satisfaction from your dream is yourself, the Dreamer. You cannot form a Dreaming Club where you all combine your energies and dream one big dream. You can share a common opinion and maybe a common agenda but never a common dream. Each dream has its own signature that sets it apart from any other dream....CLICK TITLE TO READ MORE

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No child is a mistake. Life is a very precious and to carry life in one’s body for nine months is a privilege. There is nothing called an illegitimate child. Yes, there are illegitimate parents . Legitimacy relates to the law, and the law only affects citizens of that land. There is no law against being born, just as there is no law against being a passenger or a parcel. However there is a law against driving a car, without a license.

 

Whether you’re born in wedlock, out of the lock, beside  the lock, on top of the lock or even without the lock ,you are not an illegitimate child. When God allowed you to be born, he had a plan for you. A purpose. You were born on purpose. You did not break the law by being born.

 

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I am sorry I have been away for so long. To dispel the rumors, no I was not on honeymoon, nor did I have a baby (or any seemingly life changing episode).I didn’t fall off the edge of the earth (although I kinda wish I did, because that would have made a perfect excuse.)Maybe also to point out , I did ...

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This week I had to console a friend of mine for hours after her boyfriend told her she was an ‘Off layer’. For those of you that don’t know what that is, an Off-Layer is a chicken that is too old to lay eggs.It just takes up space that should be filled by fresher, younger chicken. Even its meat when cooked can be fibrous and hard. Now this girl, my friend ,is a gorgeous ,healthy 28 year old with a good job, car and her own decent place.This is why I am quite angry today.

 

Two years ago, this 

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Well , perhaps I’ll start with the basics.

1. Hang Yourself and hope the rope doesn’t break because it often does. Then you’ll live the rest of your life having to explain to people where you got the horrible scar on your neck and no one will take you seriously at job interviews.

 

2. Throw Yourself In Front Of A Moving Train.This is very messy but the worst that could happen is,as you know train schedules are so erratic in Zimbabwe .You might actually have to wait hours because the train often runs late. You wait so long that you change your mind about killing yourself altogether.3. Swallow Crushed Glass. A friend’s brother did this and survived as they always do.I wasn’t sure whether the flowers should go with an ‘I’m sorry’ card or a ‘Cong...

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I dreamt last night there was a knock on my door. It was a Sunday .A perfect day not to have visitors. I was doing nothing, something that most people do on Sundays and some people do with their whole life. I got up and opened the door. There ,in police clothes, stood my Government Name.

“It’s you”, I said, disappointed.

“No .It’s you”, she replied.Ha ha.

“Go away” .I said,slamming the door shut.

I have a love hate relationship with my Government Name. There is something about all things final that I dislike. Finals like endings scare me. Like rubber stamps and wedding days. 

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Just recently I was arbitrating a serious conflict between 2 tenants. I will not get into the details of the circumstances leading to the conflict but just point out that upon listening to both sides of the story, it was quite clear that both parties were wrong. The one party though after I pointed out that she had equally contributed to the conflict ,instead of apologizing ,defended herself by stating how good, humble and spiritual she is and how the allegations were completely ridiculous. She went on to state in a rather divine tone how she had forgiven the other party and swore on the Bible she reads everyday. I have never been more annoyed. She sat there raving about what a nice person she is. There is something sickeningly wrong with a person who boasts about how humble they a..CLICK TITLE TO READ MORE

 

Ever had a feeling that God doesn’t like you?

That you work really hard and he never shows up for his part of the deal?

That you’ve been divinely stood up…..in the literal sense?It’s a horrible feeling. You sit there, on destiny’s bus stop ,all packed up. You’ve folded your sweat neatly and packed it into the Monarch suitcase .All the groundwork, research and paper work bottled in pretty 100ml green glass bottles .You’ve polished your talents with Kiwi shoe polish and put them in a compartment with the other shoes. You’ve even memorised the motivational quotes just in case you’ll need a fix along the way. You’re ready. Then….

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